Is this the WILDEST Publix parking lot incident we’ve seen all year? Because honey, one man connected to a literal VAMPIRE CULT MURDER just got arrested in the most chaotic way possible, and we are LIVING for the tea.
Listen, we don’t know what Everette Krichbaum was doing just sitting in his vehicle at a Publix on Tuesday, but apparently 35-year-old James Gay decided it was the perfect time to pull up and start some drama. And not just any drama, darling—we’re talking a full-blown machete-wielding altercation that landed BOTH men in the hospital. The police report is absolutely JUICY, and honestly, we can’t make this stuff up if we tried.
But here’s where it gets absolutely SPICY: Krichbaum isn’t just some random aggressive dude. This man has HISTORY. We’re talking about being tied to the 2011 “Vampire Cult Murder”—yes, you read that correctly. A VAMPIRE CULT. In 2011! While the rest of us were obsessing over reality TV, apparently Florida was living in a real-life horror movie, and this guy was allegedly involved. The fact that he’s showing up in a machete brawl over a decade later is giving us all the unhinged energy we never asked for.
Both men were arrested for aggravated battery with a deadly weapon, because apparently bringing a MACHETE to a parking lot argument is apparently still a thing people do in Florida. The hospitalization details are sparse, but we’re imagining the Publix employees were absolutely SHOOK. Nothing says “grocery shopping” like witnessing a full combat situation in the parking lot, am I right?
The internet is absolutely losing it over this development. Fans are asking serious questions about how someone connected to a vampire cult murder conviction is just walking around Florida getting into parking lot brawls. Like, where was the supervision? How is he out here living his best unhinged life? The accusations are flying, and honestly, we’re here for every single second of the chaos.
This story has everything—alleged cult connections, violent crime history, machetes, and a Publix parking lot showdown. It’s giving “Florida Man” in the most extra way possible, and we absolutely cannot look away.
What do you think? A) This is the wildest Florida story ever and we need a documentary B) This is deeply disturbing and we should be concerned about public safety